It’s the first day of the rest of my life. Can I start it over?
After my last day at Dair yesterday, today has been a bit weird. I’ve had chores to do but I spent the morning procrastinating, drinking coffee, eating snacks, my thoughts getting stuck in the same old loop of doubt, binge watching Netflix and beating myself up for eating snacks.
I forced myself to do a short work out but it didn’t really help, my head wasn’t in the right place and I rushed through it thinking about finishing. After ticking off a handful of the easier tasks for the day it was time to walk Boomer again.
I realised how beautiful the late afternoon was, and there won’t be many more days like this this year. I decided to change straight into bike gear when I got home and at least ride for 30 mins, turn around and come back. Nothing hard, just clear my head, try and salvage the day.
I did, but it wasn’t until I turned around that I started to let go of the shit feeling I’ve been carrying around. I must have glanced at my watch every few minutes to see when it was time to turn around. But when I did, I stopped thinking about it and it just became a nice sunny evening ride.
I also had a few messages from friends, checking I was ok, that definitely helped.
I don’t really have anything else to say but this was way too long for an IG post so there you go – that was my day. I guess the moral is: make yourself go for a ride for at least an hour, it’ll help.
-esp
